Some days you jump out of bed shouting “Carpe Diem” and others you pull the covers over your head and have a “hygge experience” as explained so succinctly by Suzie of Suzie Speaks. Today was the latter. There is a reason for feeling lukewarm about today, and if you are upset my sad stories then I urge you not to read any further than this.
Today is the day that my son should be celebrating his 27th birthday. But for whatever reason he chose, my son’s soul did not want to hang around on this planet. It entered this earthly plane and left it straight away. I manage to survive because I believe his soul chose me, a strong woman, to have that experience.
So forgive me if I am lukewarm today. Forgive me if I fail to see the funny side, the awe in nature, nor want to entertain or hold an intelligent conversation about mulit-million dollar questions.
Today is a day for embracing the simple things in life. Curling up on a sofa, watching the rain run in rivulets down the windowpane as I feel the tears do the same down my cheek. It is a day to soak in a bath, breathing deep the aromas of clary sage and jasmine. Oils that I know will bring forth more tears. Yesterday I heard about the death of a gentleman who has gone to be with his Maker. He was not my father, but he showed me fatherly love. It warms my heart to think that my son and this man will find each other, and that my son now has a guide in spirit with him. It warms me a little to reminisce
Tomorrow is also likely to be a day where I feel lukewarm. Over the coming days, as the days lengthen and signs of spring can be seen, I will begin to warm up, like the crocus that pops it’s head up out of the soil, the colour will return to my life. But for now, it’s an oxtail stew with dumplings for dinner, a cuddle on the sofa, wrapped up warm and snuggled with a man who understands me. The simple things in life.
Be kind to yourself
Thank you for reading